Before I get down to business, I thought I'd throw in some fun little updates. First of all, Wednesday will mark my one transfer away from going into the Missionary Training Center, so we're getting there :T Yesterday I went shopping for missionary stuff with my mom at the Tanger Outlet shopping center up in Commerce and then at the mall of Georgia. I got some socks, some shoes, a watch (I'm bummed I haven't been a watch wearer before now- they're pretty classy. Especially since it seems like they're losing out to cell phones for time keeping nowadays.) and a couple of baseball caps (I've been wanting a good Braves hat for a few years now so I finally got one that I'm fairly well satisfied with. And I got a Yankees hat- I guess this is my official announcement that I'm going to be a Yankees fan (post mission of course :I). Yankee stadium is in my mission, the Met's stadium isn't, plus, being in the same league and even division as the Braves, I just don't think I could bring myself to liking the Mets. So I'm sorry for all you haters out there, but Yankees all the way :D). Woowee. Job is still going well- it's looking like I'll have just enough to pay for as much as I set a goal to pay for my mission and to pay for at least a good part of clothes and all that. I could go on and on about how much of a blessing it's been to be able to get that job... But I guess I'll spare us both the time because I think I've talked about it before :I I got a letter from my Mission President the other day, so that contained all sorts of goodies, stuff like the history of the mission, a general letter to all the incoming missionaries, requests for driving record information and so on. And Spanish branch- that's going well. I feel like I'm picking up more and more every week. I've started studying Predicad Mi Evangelio and I'm continuing to read El Libro de Mormon, and that really helps, at the very least it seems to help bring the Spirit and help out with the gift of tongues. So there you go, I think that's about all the news I have. I'm just a-chugging along.
Now. For the message, what I've been thinking about and stuff. I'll try to be a little bit more concise- I feel like in my past posts I've been sort of all over the place. But other than having my former roommates already know about the whole testimony in Spanish Branch thing, I haven't heard a single other person acknowledge this blog, so I have no idea how people are taking it. Haha but I guess that's fine, I'm not trying to write to an audience. I'm just trying to help others learn and grow through the means that Heavenly Father has lead me to learn and grow as I've gone along my life, particularly in the direction of serving a mission. But yeah, thank you for reading and putting up with me when I'm ridiculous- I certainly hope I've been of some sort of help to you! Anywhoo...
This week I went and saw the midnight premiere of The Dark Knight Rises, and then last night I went back and watched The Dark Knight just to remind myself of the details and be able to piece things together a bit better. I like the series in the sense that it gets me thinking and that it's a little deeper than just having the bad guy want power and money and just being outwitted or overpowered by the good guy. There are a lot of moral and emotional struggles and it's all done in a fairly well put together package. There are things that don't always add up (like the idea of completely filling to big boats with tons of tanks of gasoline without anyone noticing -___- I guess stuff like that just adds to the scary factor of the villain), but the movies still draws me in and affect me in a way that most other movies don't.
In particular the underlying motives and actions of the Joker got me thinking last night. He's a twisting monster, not set on money, but on "sending a message" as he so declares. *Spoiler Alert* He sets up scenarios that mess with people and break them down to their core values. He does it all for the purpose of showing how the society "norm" for living life and going about things as individuals and a whole is to a degree meaningless in it's routine. I'm sure it cuts a lot deeper than that, but the Joker's greatest success is when he corrupts the city hero, Harvey Dent, to go into a rage of fury, seeking revenge for the injustice brought upon him. In this, the Joker believes that he's shown that even the best can be corrupted, and had this great hero been shown to the people of Gothem in that light, it would have been a crippling blow. Hope for the forthcoming better tomorrow would have been lost.
So in a world that does seem to be facing an increasing amount of corruption and loss of moral conviction, is there any sort of hope? Absolutely.
This is something that really drives me, the idea that there is hope for better in all aspects of living. And I mention the Batman movie to turn that message from the Joker on its head. There is indeed the possibility of people who seem as solid as it gets to crumble away to show a reality of a lack of support. I've seen that happen twice this summer- people who I really looked up to and for whom I had a great deal of respect have in some way or another gone against the exact thing for I which I had respect. I won't go into details, but it's been a hard blow watching that happen. But as I study and pray, I know that just as much as the best of people have the possibility of losing all that makes them respectable, any ordinary person has the potential to becoming an inspiring and incredible person.
Where does this hope come from? Our Savior, Jesus Christ, and His willingness to give up His life in living and in death. Because of His devotion to doing the will of the Father and His love for us, He succeeded in living the perfect life and was able to take on the burden of our sins, infirmities and so forth. His sacrifice allows us to progress, rid ourselves of the mark of sin, and in some shape or form, become perfect in the life to come. Knowing that all the suffering we face in this life will end if we make good choices through it all is a driving force to help a person endure to the end. That's one aspect of hope that I think of when the topic is brought up.
Another more immediate aspect of hope that I think of comes into play in a less eternal perspective, the hope of change. I believe this is a big stumbling block, people develop in certain ways and think they're stuck like that forever, or other people convince them that such is true. Some issues take more effort to resolve than others, but if handled in a proper manner, I believe that all problems can be resolved or at the very least controlled. Once again, this changing power comes from the Atonement of Christ. He suffered all things to be able to understand us and to be able to counsel with us and help us get through literally anything and everything (Alma 7:11-12). Of course it takes faith on our part, and faith requires action, but if we desire to change, it's certainly possible.
So what qualifies a person to this wonderful gift, the ability to be succored by Christ and His experience? Just existing, that's about all there is to it. Jesus Christ suffered for the sins of everyone. Not a single person is excluded from the great sacrifice. Knowing this, that Christ suffered all that all mankind has suffered, not only potentially deepens ones appreciate for such an incomprehensible act, but it also leads to the point that every one has hope. Hope for change, hope for eventual perfection and hope for eternal life. From the lowly drunkard to the pompous billionaire, all are covered.
There's a line from "The One," a song on the 2011 EFY CD, that goes a little something like this...
"He sees me for what I can become"
When I hear that in the right mindset, the Spirit runs through every fiber of my being testifying the truthfulness of that line. Thinking about the manner in which our Father in Heaven sees us really is incredible. He doesn't look at us and see us in our faults, in all of the negatives that we just naturally have. He looks inside and sees our potential and is willing to help us unlock that potential and become who He, who truly wants the best for us, wants us to become. Can you imagine how different the world would be if we could see like this? I believe that if we were to take a person that we perceive as being the lowest of the low and look at them under this light, we would be so struck with awe and regret for casting our judgments on them that we would want to forever hide ourselves from the face of the Lord. And yet we all cast judgments and compare others, fellow sons and daughters of our Father in Heaven to standards of which we often fall short ourselves. It's quite the predicament, but having a taste of the hope that everyone has can help us to build each other up rather than tear each other down. As a missionary, I hope to share the message of the Restored Gospel, this message of hope with all, doubting not the transforming power of the Atonement. I'm grateful that I've had this taste of hope for myself and hope for others, and I hope to bring this message to the people of New York.
Another line that really gets me going is from the song "We Believe" on the same CD:
"See there's hope for a bright tomorrow/Knowing we are the ones today."
Hope. Even in a world that seems to be getting more dark and dreary, the light of truth keeps growing brighter and brighter. This, however, isn't a passive thing- it takes action as a part of having faith in all of God's promises. So to anyone that's made it this far, always seek to try harder and to be a better person. Seek to inspire those around you by example and by sharing the truths you know when the opportunities come. Share you're hope with the world, don't keep it to yourself. The only way to run out is to not act or share. I'm definitely not perfect in this, but I'm trying and I've seen the blessings of my efforts. This world is so full of hope, but nobody seems to know it, so let's get the message out!
"Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God" -Ether 12:4
Monday, July 23, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Trabajo, Trabajo, Trabajo...
I think I might have mentioned in my last post that I've been working a lot, trying to earn some money to be able to pay what it costs to serve a mission. And so yeah that's really consumed a lot of my time this past little while. I've been working between thirty five and forty hours a week at Domino's and then it seems like I fill in my off time there working on the cow fence for the Gregerson's (I guess I'd best describe them as a family of friends of mine. Something like that... haha). At the end of the week, I usually end up working a little over fifty hours, and it can be pretty exhausting, especially when I don't have a lot of free time to do other things to wind down and stuff.
All this work just brings to mind the role that working hard has played in my life and how that will play a role while serving a mission. Good parenting and various experiences through my life thus far have blessed me with an attitude of diligence in most of the things in which I become involved. Back when I was training seriously for swimming, I would pretty much always try my hardest at practice, and there was nothing that felt better than having a good workout where I was able to stay on top of the intervals and be consistent with any timed sets. Going through school, especially since about half way through my junior year in high school, I just haven't minded taking the time to do the work and most of the time I tried to do a good job with everything. And now, being employed, I'm just grateful to have a job and so I try to be the best asset to my employers that I can be by working hard. Out of the things which Heavenly Father has blessed me with, I believe that this attitude of diligence has taken more of a part in what successes I've had thus far than anything else.
Being persistent in the work helps a lot too. I'm sure there are a lot of big, successful businesses out there that have faced crises at various points in their existences, and had they just given up on their efforts, there would have been no progression or moving forward in the least. Same thing with athletes, if they were to just quit when they didn't get the results they wanted, then we likely wouldn't have any of the big names that everybody knows. I went through that a couple times with swimming, the first time being when I was pretty young, and pretty shortly after deciding to stick out the tough times, I had some great successes wherein my hard work had finally paid off (of course the same sort of deal happened when I did quit training seriously, but that was a little more complicated and turned out to be more of God telling me that swimming had played its role in my life and that it was time to move on to other things. So yep :T). Persistence is just as essential to success as is hard work. It's what keeps pushing you forward when everything else is pushing you back. It's the make or brake factor, what really determines where you end up. A persistent person is one who disregards the easy way because they know that in the end all of suffering and pain will give way to the triumph of victory.
Goal setting is another aspect of this conversation that really should play a role in daily living. I guess people don't always sit down and officially set goals, but I think that whatever you call it, it is important to have some sort of driving factor, some reason for putting in work and being persistent. Setting goals is definitely one of the biggest driving factors for my willingness to put in effort into the things I do. For instance, school- I work hard because I set goals to get good grades. But then I believe that goals go far beyond what you see at the surface and really give way to sort of a foundation of what makes you tick. So yeah lets jump back to school. I work hard because I want good grades. I want good grades so that I can get into a top notch grad school program. I'd like to get into a top notch grad school program so that I can get a good job. I'd like a good job so that I can make good money. I'd like to make good money so that money isn't a worry and so that I can take my family on nice vacations and so that I can have a good home to entertain. I'd like to be able to do all that to bring people together to have good relationships of love and genuine care. And I'd like to do that so that my family and I and as many people as possible can have the influence of the gospel in our lives and be able to essentially live together forever in joy. I guess that's kind of a long string of things and I don't know if other people think things out like that- maybe I'm just weird... But when I'm able to break things down and relate it to bigger, even eternal perspectives, then that helps me to continue to work at whatever it is with even more diligence than before. So goal setting = good stuff.
Now. How does this all play into missionary work? I haven't ever been a missionary before, but from what I've seen and learned, this all plays in as an essential part of the work. First off finding the motivation for becoming involved in the work leads to putting in the effort. I could go on for page after page describing why I've decided to serve a mission, but it essentially boils down to me having the desire to help pay back what I can to a gracious Father in Heaven who has blessed me with so much. Because of that, I want to share what's made me happy with other people, and I'm willing to work hard and get out of my comfort zone to so. And I know that even when I am willing to work hard, things are not going to just work out well and fall nicely into place. There are going to be many trials and hardships along the way, but the only way to get past and come out on top is to not give up, but to realize that Heavenly Father is behind you all the way, and that when you choose to rely wholly on Him, He'll give you the strength to keep chugging along. From what I've been taught and from what I've experienced, this pattern ultimately leads to success. It might not be five thousand baptisms, but you'll never know the fruits of your labor without the labor. I'd rather come home after two years with not terribly impressive numbers but knowing that I did all I could rather than knowing that there was more I could have done.
I hope I haven't sounded too prideful or boastful in any sort of way as I've described what I believe. I definitely don't consider myself all knowing or even particularly knowledgeable in any subject really. The things I write are just things that I feel like God has blessed me to be able to see, and I just hope to pass those on to anyone that's interested. God has been gracious to get me where I am today, and though I've worked hard, He's provided me with everything I've needed to get here, and I know that I would be nowhere if I were left to my own means. I think Ammon said it best when he explained, "I do not boast in my own strength, nor in my own wisdom; but behold, my joy is full, yea my heart is brim with joy, and I will rejoice in my God. Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things..." (Alma 26:11-12).
I guess my ending message that to be successful, you need to find good motivation, work hard and then be persistent. And when you do all that for the purpose of glorifying God, you'll just come out way on top :D
"For behold the field is white already to harvest; and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul;" -Doctrine and Covenants 4:4
All this work just brings to mind the role that working hard has played in my life and how that will play a role while serving a mission. Good parenting and various experiences through my life thus far have blessed me with an attitude of diligence in most of the things in which I become involved. Back when I was training seriously for swimming, I would pretty much always try my hardest at practice, and there was nothing that felt better than having a good workout where I was able to stay on top of the intervals and be consistent with any timed sets. Going through school, especially since about half way through my junior year in high school, I just haven't minded taking the time to do the work and most of the time I tried to do a good job with everything. And now, being employed, I'm just grateful to have a job and so I try to be the best asset to my employers that I can be by working hard. Out of the things which Heavenly Father has blessed me with, I believe that this attitude of diligence has taken more of a part in what successes I've had thus far than anything else.
Being persistent in the work helps a lot too. I'm sure there are a lot of big, successful businesses out there that have faced crises at various points in their existences, and had they just given up on their efforts, there would have been no progression or moving forward in the least. Same thing with athletes, if they were to just quit when they didn't get the results they wanted, then we likely wouldn't have any of the big names that everybody knows. I went through that a couple times with swimming, the first time being when I was pretty young, and pretty shortly after deciding to stick out the tough times, I had some great successes wherein my hard work had finally paid off (of course the same sort of deal happened when I did quit training seriously, but that was a little more complicated and turned out to be more of God telling me that swimming had played its role in my life and that it was time to move on to other things. So yep :T). Persistence is just as essential to success as is hard work. It's what keeps pushing you forward when everything else is pushing you back. It's the make or brake factor, what really determines where you end up. A persistent person is one who disregards the easy way because they know that in the end all of suffering and pain will give way to the triumph of victory.
Goal setting is another aspect of this conversation that really should play a role in daily living. I guess people don't always sit down and officially set goals, but I think that whatever you call it, it is important to have some sort of driving factor, some reason for putting in work and being persistent. Setting goals is definitely one of the biggest driving factors for my willingness to put in effort into the things I do. For instance, school- I work hard because I set goals to get good grades. But then I believe that goals go far beyond what you see at the surface and really give way to sort of a foundation of what makes you tick. So yeah lets jump back to school. I work hard because I want good grades. I want good grades so that I can get into a top notch grad school program. I'd like to get into a top notch grad school program so that I can get a good job. I'd like a good job so that I can make good money. I'd like to make good money so that money isn't a worry and so that I can take my family on nice vacations and so that I can have a good home to entertain. I'd like to be able to do all that to bring people together to have good relationships of love and genuine care. And I'd like to do that so that my family and I and as many people as possible can have the influence of the gospel in our lives and be able to essentially live together forever in joy. I guess that's kind of a long string of things and I don't know if other people think things out like that- maybe I'm just weird... But when I'm able to break things down and relate it to bigger, even eternal perspectives, then that helps me to continue to work at whatever it is with even more diligence than before. So goal setting = good stuff.
Now. How does this all play into missionary work? I haven't ever been a missionary before, but from what I've seen and learned, this all plays in as an essential part of the work. First off finding the motivation for becoming involved in the work leads to putting in the effort. I could go on for page after page describing why I've decided to serve a mission, but it essentially boils down to me having the desire to help pay back what I can to a gracious Father in Heaven who has blessed me with so much. Because of that, I want to share what's made me happy with other people, and I'm willing to work hard and get out of my comfort zone to so. And I know that even when I am willing to work hard, things are not going to just work out well and fall nicely into place. There are going to be many trials and hardships along the way, but the only way to get past and come out on top is to not give up, but to realize that Heavenly Father is behind you all the way, and that when you choose to rely wholly on Him, He'll give you the strength to keep chugging along. From what I've been taught and from what I've experienced, this pattern ultimately leads to success. It might not be five thousand baptisms, but you'll never know the fruits of your labor without the labor. I'd rather come home after two years with not terribly impressive numbers but knowing that I did all I could rather than knowing that there was more I could have done.
I hope I haven't sounded too prideful or boastful in any sort of way as I've described what I believe. I definitely don't consider myself all knowing or even particularly knowledgeable in any subject really. The things I write are just things that I feel like God has blessed me to be able to see, and I just hope to pass those on to anyone that's interested. God has been gracious to get me where I am today, and though I've worked hard, He's provided me with everything I've needed to get here, and I know that I would be nowhere if I were left to my own means. I think Ammon said it best when he explained, "I do not boast in my own strength, nor in my own wisdom; but behold, my joy is full, yea my heart is brim with joy, and I will rejoice in my God. Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things..." (Alma 26:11-12).
I guess my ending message that to be successful, you need to find good motivation, work hard and then be persistent. And when you do all that for the purpose of glorifying God, you'll just come out way on top :D
"For behold the field is white already to harvest; and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul;" -Doctrine and Covenants 4:4
Sunday, July 8, 2012
"Y Ahora Jeffrey Compartirá Su Testimonio..."
There is a Spanish branch (o rama español; congregation for spanish speakers) at the building at which I attend church, and so to try to get used to hearing el Evangelio en español, I've been going and sitting in on the Sacrament meeting (just the general meeting with everybody where we partake of bread and water in similitude of the last supper and listen to people from the congregation speak on various subjects as assigned by church leaders). I've come a long way from the first time I sat in on their meeting, but I usually only have a general idea of what exactly is going on, and that's only if I'm really concentrating on the person and what they're saying. I really enjoy going- it's giving me a good taste of what's to come, and I just enjoy situations where I get to have a jab at using what little bit of Spanish I know (delivering pizzas a las personas que hablan español es muy bueno :D).
Anywhoo today was a pretty normal day at church and so following my gringo meetings, I went and took my seat towards the back, ready to just get out of it what I could. I was pretty sleepy from staying out a little later socializing (and such socializing opportunities have been somewhat seldom throughout this summer, so I was game for a little loss of sleep. Sorry about that unintentional alliteration :T), and so I wasn't as focused as I could've been and so consequently, when President Samuels (the leader of the congregation) stood after the two members of the branch gave their talks (or sermons, whatever you'd like to call them) I didn't quite follow all that he was saying. I knew that he commended the speakers for their words, but from there I just kind of went on to thinking about some of my plans for this upcoming week and about getting home and eating and possibly sleeping and all that hooplah. And then I kind of noticed him looking at me and then he said my name and I could tell he was saying some things about me serving a mission and how I was going to be going to New York and speaking Spanish and I then I pretty much got out of it that I was to come forward and share my testimony of the truths that I had come to know throughout my life. I've heard and experienced just a little bit that one of the hardest parts of learning a language is gaining confidence in speaking that language to president others, and so as you can imagine, I felt under qualified for such a task, to say the least. When I got up to the stand, President Samuels said something along the lines of "You probably have no idea what I asked you to do, huh?" And so I at least said, "You want me to bear my testimony, right?" After he gave the affirmative I started in. It wasn't elaborate of course. I kind of wasn't sure of what to say, so I kind of stopped for a little while after which President Samuels told me I could say some stuff in English and have him translate, so I did, but I still just was not sure what to say. I kind of wrapped up what few things I did say and then ended it with a "yo digo estas palabras en el nombre de Jesucristo, amen." and then took my seat again.
I still have no idea what motivated President Samuels call on me like that (my best guess would be that he noticed me dosing during the first speakers remarks -___-), or how exactly I fit into the rest of the meeting. Whatever the case may be, it was an interesting experience, one that kind of left me excited to get to the work, but one that kind of knocked me upside the head and made me realize how much I have to learn and how it is going to be quite the undertaking to learn an entirely new language and sort of a general culture that goes behind it. It brought to mind the promise that when you open your mouth it will be filled (Doctrine and Covenants 33:8-11). I've heard various stories from different people about such a promise being true in regards to languages, and although I didn't open my mouth and bare the most beautiful testimony the world had ever heard, I still have faith that such will happen. Thinking about it, it was miraculous in and of itself that I had received the preparation necessary to at least introduce myself, explain my situation and share a simple testimony of the things that are so deeply rooted in me. It's a start. And what's better is that I know that as I put my faith in God, Spanish will come and I will eventually be able to speak my mind perfectly, and with the guidance of the Holy Ghost, I'll be able to come up with the words that the truth deserves.
Essentially, this experience just led back to a topic that I've thought about more and more frequently- that Heavenly Father ALWAYS fulfills His promises that He makes with His children. I've been gaining a stronger testimony of this fact, and as a missionary, having a testimony of God being beyond dependable on every aspect of His being seems like it'd be very important. I might even say essential. There are so many promises made to missionaries, from blessings for sacrifice to success in the work to receiving direction in all matters from the Holy Ghost, and it seems like if you don't have faith in any of those promises, you really don't have the right mindset or motivation for serving. In my most recent reading of the Book of Mormon, I was able to see the promises of the Lord fulfilled and phrases such as "...according to his word..." really stuck out to me. In addition, reading in the Old Testament about the promises that God makes with His servants and in the deliverance of the Hebrew people from the land of Egypt, it's extremely clear that God does follow through, every single time. That's just one of the many aspects that makes Him whole and perfect.
Along with that, though, comes the necessity of patience in waiting for fulfillment of His promises and realizing that waiting is only for your benefit. I believe that one of the most common reasons of individuals falling away from truth is from demanding on gratification on a personal time scale, not on God's time scale. This all ties in to the fact that a lot of people either don't realize or don't want to face the fact that suffering in all sorts of trial and affliction is not from any sort of apathy from God, but actually stems from His love for us and for His desire for us to learn and grow. It might seem counterintuitive that such a loving God would let His children suffer, but after some deeper thinking, it all kind of fits together. Can an athlete honestly build muscle and become better without suffering the pain of a rigorous workout? Or if a parent were able to shield a child from every pain or negative experience, would that child be able to survive even a minute in the real work? We don't always understand the pain in the moment, and often times it doesn't become any clearer after the fact. What's important to understand is that God transcends all understanding at times, and that in the end His whole purpose is to "bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39) He doesn't put anything in our path that's not to help us get back to Him.
I've found that as I've had learned to trust in Him and in His greater planning abilities and have had faith in the promises He makes, I've been able to develop an attitude that helps me to get through all the challenges that have come up in my life and help me to come out on top. I am not at all suggesting that I know how to handle things perfectly. I still lose this eternal perspective from time to time and get caught up in the moment and mess up. But I get back up after I fall and I keep trying. I'll share an ongoing story that kind of ties things together nicely.
As I went about the school year, I had planned to just come home over the summer, get a job easily (I had stuff planned out and back ups for that plan and back ups for the back up and so on and so forth) and then just work my booty to be able to pay for the opportunity to serve a mission. Well things didn't work out that smoothly- I sent out probably like fifteen emails to people from church asking about work opportunities, I probably turned in twenty plus applications, I even had three interviews, but I went for well over a month without a single job offer. In the meantime, I had the opportunity to go through the temple, and in the Celestial Room, the room where you really do feel closer to God, I expressed in prayer my pains and frustrations in not being able to find a job. I then got an impression, certainly through the Holy Ghost, that I was indeed going to get a job and that things would work out well because of the righteous desires of my heart (to save up all of the money made on the job for a mission). I trusted in that promise and continued in my efforts of finding a job. It wasn't until the beginning of June that I actually got my job at Domino's. So why did it take so long? I'm not entirely sure, but I think during my search for a job I learned a lot about how to self discipline myself on nearly a month and a half of completely unstructured days, I learned a lot of valuable skills pertaining to job hunting and I was able to get some good language and Gospel studying in. I'm sure I'll continue to see the fruits that came out of that period of time as I keep living life. On top of that, when tips aren't the best and my schedule isn't what I'd prefer, Heavenly Father lets me know that it'll get better. And on top of that, I've been blessed to help out with a project at the house of my friends that has brought me up to working about fifty hours a week, and so I've been able to make enough money to get me where I need to be. And just the whole timing of things has worked out perfectly in that my stinky work schedule allowed me to put in a lot of time into this other project right when it needed it, and now that the rush is over for that project, I really like my work schedule for Domino's. I could just keep on going with all the little tender mercies, but I feel like I've blabbered on for far too long now...
In the end it all just works out too nicely to be just coincidence. God has a plan and and makes promises all along the way. He fulfills our righteous desires in His own ways, often times requiring patience on out part and understanding the fact that His means of doing things are often not understandable in the moment. I know that serving a mission isn't going to be a pain free, super easy experience. It's going to be almost a constant struggle, but I've learned that just being consistent with the little things- prayer, scripture study, etc.- with faith and understanding that God's promises will be fulfilled, things work out just as their supposed to. From being able to speak from the pulpit in Spanish to gaining eternal life, it's all possible because God loves us and is providing the best for us. I know that to be true. So keep on chugging along!
"For I will fulfill my promises which I have made unto the children of men, that I will do unto them while they are in the flesh-" 2 Nephi 10:17
Anywhoo today was a pretty normal day at church and so following my gringo meetings, I went and took my seat towards the back, ready to just get out of it what I could. I was pretty sleepy from staying out a little later socializing (and such socializing opportunities have been somewhat seldom throughout this summer, so I was game for a little loss of sleep. Sorry about that unintentional alliteration :T), and so I wasn't as focused as I could've been and so consequently, when President Samuels (the leader of the congregation) stood after the two members of the branch gave their talks (or sermons, whatever you'd like to call them) I didn't quite follow all that he was saying. I knew that he commended the speakers for their words, but from there I just kind of went on to thinking about some of my plans for this upcoming week and about getting home and eating and possibly sleeping and all that hooplah. And then I kind of noticed him looking at me and then he said my name and I could tell he was saying some things about me serving a mission and how I was going to be going to New York and speaking Spanish and I then I pretty much got out of it that I was to come forward and share my testimony of the truths that I had come to know throughout my life. I've heard and experienced just a little bit that one of the hardest parts of learning a language is gaining confidence in speaking that language to president others, and so as you can imagine, I felt under qualified for such a task, to say the least. When I got up to the stand, President Samuels said something along the lines of "You probably have no idea what I asked you to do, huh?" And so I at least said, "You want me to bear my testimony, right?" After he gave the affirmative I started in. It wasn't elaborate of course. I kind of wasn't sure of what to say, so I kind of stopped for a little while after which President Samuels told me I could say some stuff in English and have him translate, so I did, but I still just was not sure what to say. I kind of wrapped up what few things I did say and then ended it with a "yo digo estas palabras en el nombre de Jesucristo, amen." and then took my seat again.
I still have no idea what motivated President Samuels call on me like that (my best guess would be that he noticed me dosing during the first speakers remarks -___-), or how exactly I fit into the rest of the meeting. Whatever the case may be, it was an interesting experience, one that kind of left me excited to get to the work, but one that kind of knocked me upside the head and made me realize how much I have to learn and how it is going to be quite the undertaking to learn an entirely new language and sort of a general culture that goes behind it. It brought to mind the promise that when you open your mouth it will be filled (Doctrine and Covenants 33:8-11). I've heard various stories from different people about such a promise being true in regards to languages, and although I didn't open my mouth and bare the most beautiful testimony the world had ever heard, I still have faith that such will happen. Thinking about it, it was miraculous in and of itself that I had received the preparation necessary to at least introduce myself, explain my situation and share a simple testimony of the things that are so deeply rooted in me. It's a start. And what's better is that I know that as I put my faith in God, Spanish will come and I will eventually be able to speak my mind perfectly, and with the guidance of the Holy Ghost, I'll be able to come up with the words that the truth deserves.
Essentially, this experience just led back to a topic that I've thought about more and more frequently- that Heavenly Father ALWAYS fulfills His promises that He makes with His children. I've been gaining a stronger testimony of this fact, and as a missionary, having a testimony of God being beyond dependable on every aspect of His being seems like it'd be very important. I might even say essential. There are so many promises made to missionaries, from blessings for sacrifice to success in the work to receiving direction in all matters from the Holy Ghost, and it seems like if you don't have faith in any of those promises, you really don't have the right mindset or motivation for serving. In my most recent reading of the Book of Mormon, I was able to see the promises of the Lord fulfilled and phrases such as "...according to his word..." really stuck out to me. In addition, reading in the Old Testament about the promises that God makes with His servants and in the deliverance of the Hebrew people from the land of Egypt, it's extremely clear that God does follow through, every single time. That's just one of the many aspects that makes Him whole and perfect.
Along with that, though, comes the necessity of patience in waiting for fulfillment of His promises and realizing that waiting is only for your benefit. I believe that one of the most common reasons of individuals falling away from truth is from demanding on gratification on a personal time scale, not on God's time scale. This all ties in to the fact that a lot of people either don't realize or don't want to face the fact that suffering in all sorts of trial and affliction is not from any sort of apathy from God, but actually stems from His love for us and for His desire for us to learn and grow. It might seem counterintuitive that such a loving God would let His children suffer, but after some deeper thinking, it all kind of fits together. Can an athlete honestly build muscle and become better without suffering the pain of a rigorous workout? Or if a parent were able to shield a child from every pain or negative experience, would that child be able to survive even a minute in the real work? We don't always understand the pain in the moment, and often times it doesn't become any clearer after the fact. What's important to understand is that God transcends all understanding at times, and that in the end His whole purpose is to "bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39) He doesn't put anything in our path that's not to help us get back to Him.
I've found that as I've had learned to trust in Him and in His greater planning abilities and have had faith in the promises He makes, I've been able to develop an attitude that helps me to get through all the challenges that have come up in my life and help me to come out on top. I am not at all suggesting that I know how to handle things perfectly. I still lose this eternal perspective from time to time and get caught up in the moment and mess up. But I get back up after I fall and I keep trying. I'll share an ongoing story that kind of ties things together nicely.
As I went about the school year, I had planned to just come home over the summer, get a job easily (I had stuff planned out and back ups for that plan and back ups for the back up and so on and so forth) and then just work my booty to be able to pay for the opportunity to serve a mission. Well things didn't work out that smoothly- I sent out probably like fifteen emails to people from church asking about work opportunities, I probably turned in twenty plus applications, I even had three interviews, but I went for well over a month without a single job offer. In the meantime, I had the opportunity to go through the temple, and in the Celestial Room, the room where you really do feel closer to God, I expressed in prayer my pains and frustrations in not being able to find a job. I then got an impression, certainly through the Holy Ghost, that I was indeed going to get a job and that things would work out well because of the righteous desires of my heart (to save up all of the money made on the job for a mission). I trusted in that promise and continued in my efforts of finding a job. It wasn't until the beginning of June that I actually got my job at Domino's. So why did it take so long? I'm not entirely sure, but I think during my search for a job I learned a lot about how to self discipline myself on nearly a month and a half of completely unstructured days, I learned a lot of valuable skills pertaining to job hunting and I was able to get some good language and Gospel studying in. I'm sure I'll continue to see the fruits that came out of that period of time as I keep living life. On top of that, when tips aren't the best and my schedule isn't what I'd prefer, Heavenly Father lets me know that it'll get better. And on top of that, I've been blessed to help out with a project at the house of my friends that has brought me up to working about fifty hours a week, and so I've been able to make enough money to get me where I need to be. And just the whole timing of things has worked out perfectly in that my stinky work schedule allowed me to put in a lot of time into this other project right when it needed it, and now that the rush is over for that project, I really like my work schedule for Domino's. I could just keep on going with all the little tender mercies, but I feel like I've blabbered on for far too long now...
In the end it all just works out too nicely to be just coincidence. God has a plan and and makes promises all along the way. He fulfills our righteous desires in His own ways, often times requiring patience on out part and understanding the fact that His means of doing things are often not understandable in the moment. I know that serving a mission isn't going to be a pain free, super easy experience. It's going to be almost a constant struggle, but I've learned that just being consistent with the little things- prayer, scripture study, etc.- with faith and understanding that God's promises will be fulfilled, things work out just as their supposed to. From being able to speak from the pulpit in Spanish to gaining eternal life, it's all possible because God loves us and is providing the best for us. I know that to be true. So keep on chugging along!
"For I will fulfill my promises which I have made unto the children of men, that I will do unto them while they are in the flesh-" 2 Nephi 10:17
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